As mentioned in the previous post, I am reading the book 'Sacred Parenting'. I will admit as a parent, the parenting process can get tiring...can seem like work. I often feel guilty about that, but none more than my attitude over the last 24 hours. I was just worn out, cranky, and out of character for myself. The beautiful thing about this book, is that I feel God has given me the drive to read it...because He knows that I need focus, rejuvenation, especially as a working mother, wife, and parent. It's sad to say, but sometimes I focus on the work and not the joy parenting brings. Luckily for me, I redirected my focus this afternoon and tuned out the tantrums...and truly focused on the beautiful daughter God gave me! Here are a few direct words from this book...and just so you know, most of them apply to life in general, not just parenting:
~(pg.57)...We say we believe in God, but what good is our belief if it doesn't intersect with everyday life?
~(pg.75)...God shaped our souls in such a way that we become more complete in fellowship. Sin usually leads to isolation-whether it's the sin of substance abuse (picture a lonely drug addict escaping to get her fix), pornography (imagine a man alone in front of a computer), or even the most dramatic of sins-murder (the ultimate denial of fellowship). The Spirit of God, by contrast, moves us toward others, and this movement-though often painful-has the potential to release joy otherwise unknown in human experience.
~(pg.76)...When I prayed only for their (his children) protection, I had to fight off fear. When I prayed merely for God to change them, I lost sight of their strengths. Thanking God for them and specifically meditating on those qualities in their lives for which I am grateful has given me a much greater appreciation for the privilege of living with these children.
~(pg.80)...In other words, being stupidly serious is a mark of being stupidly forgetful. We concentrate on temporal struggles and problems at the risk of forgetting eternal blessings. Even when I've fallen into temptation, after repentance I can find great joy in knowing that God doesn't treat me as my sins deserve. From first to last, the gospel is joy-producing good news.
~(pg.84)...Families start to break down-and marriages often break down, for that matter-when we stop enjoying each other. There is a place for discipline, sacrifice, commitment, and perseverance; but an equally important place exists for enjoyment. those who never take the time to truly enjoy their family miss out on one of the most profound wonders God offers...This type of life does not adequately represent the character of our Creator God.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Sacred Parenting...
So I will admit that I am not the biggest fan of reading, but every now and then I come across something that makes me want to read more. Lately that something has been a book by the name of 'Sacred Parenting'. The following is a few bullet points taken directly from this book. If you have children or desire to have children, this is an excellent read. It truly puts parenting in perspective.
~(pg.39) "As mothers and fathers, we are simultaneously in charge of a child's emotional, physical, intellectual, social, and spiritual well being."
~(pg.33) "In Paul's mind, character gets built by learning to persevere through difficult times. If we never let our kids face difficult times, they'll never become strong enough to make a difference in a very cruel world-as Jesus made a difference on behalf of all of us."
~(pg.35) "I need to allow my kids to face challenges, failures, rejection, and pain, and then teach them to use these seemingly negative events to fuel their sense of mission and to foster their dependence on God."
~(pg.43) "We are not raising robots; we are shepherding image bearers of the Creator God who live with freedom of choice, their own wills, and personal responsibility of their own.
~(pg.43) "On the more encouraging end, none of us can mess up so badly that our children somehow extend beyond the reach of God's mercy.
~(pg.47) "In this sense, we shouldn't look at guilt as a parking lot but as a car wash. When guilt feelings keep us self-absorbed, destroy our motivation, and make us discouraged, guilt has become a parking lot-not a good thing. But when guilt reminds us that we are insufficient, and when this insufficiency points us to God-his forgiveness, his empowering Spirit, and his provision of grace-then guilt becomes a spiritual car wash."
I have a lot more to read in this book, but it has already been packed with a number of things to think about. We (as humans & parents) are not perfect, but in that imperfection we are to realize the goodness of God. Ultimately that is our goal, to show others, including our children, Christ. In some ways it is as simple as that...we are to show Christ and let them take responsibility from there.
~(pg.39) "As mothers and fathers, we are simultaneously in charge of a child's emotional, physical, intellectual, social, and spiritual well being."
~(pg.33) "In Paul's mind, character gets built by learning to persevere through difficult times. If we never let our kids face difficult times, they'll never become strong enough to make a difference in a very cruel world-as Jesus made a difference on behalf of all of us."
~(pg.35) "I need to allow my kids to face challenges, failures, rejection, and pain, and then teach them to use these seemingly negative events to fuel their sense of mission and to foster their dependence on God."
~(pg.43) "We are not raising robots; we are shepherding image bearers of the Creator God who live with freedom of choice, their own wills, and personal responsibility of their own.
~(pg.43) "On the more encouraging end, none of us can mess up so badly that our children somehow extend beyond the reach of God's mercy.
~(pg.47) "In this sense, we shouldn't look at guilt as a parking lot but as a car wash. When guilt feelings keep us self-absorbed, destroy our motivation, and make us discouraged, guilt has become a parking lot-not a good thing. But when guilt reminds us that we are insufficient, and when this insufficiency points us to God-his forgiveness, his empowering Spirit, and his provision of grace-then guilt becomes a spiritual car wash."
I have a lot more to read in this book, but it has already been packed with a number of things to think about. We (as humans & parents) are not perfect, but in that imperfection we are to realize the goodness of God. Ultimately that is our goal, to show others, including our children, Christ. In some ways it is as simple as that...we are to show Christ and let them take responsibility from there.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Opportunity everywhere...
We have opportunities everywhere...I know that is a vague statement, but to be specific...we have ample opportunity to share God. Obviously we can share God and Christ in sooo many ways, but it's fun to get to be a part of it! A few examples: our church "small group" works at a local homeless shelter every other month. I have somewhat been associated with them for several years now, but our group has been serving for about 1 1/2 years now. It is such a blessing to see God at work and to watch them grow...and don't think we aren't extremely blessed by them too.
My most recent, out of the ordinary opportunity, came on my trip this past weekend. I was sitting on a plane reading a book...the guy beside me realized I was reading about the book of James (from the Bible). To summarize the conversation...he was engaged, had just moved his fiance to a new city, was a Christian who actually served in the ministry at his church, and happen to know more about the book of James. He had a book in his hand that was required for his premarrital counseling...therefore, I told him of another book that was good for marriage (The 6 mosquitoes-actually more of a study and self reflection). What I didn't tell him was that I just happen to bring an extra copy of that study with me. So, as I was waiting to be picked up at the airport...I realized that he was on the phone and was also waiting on his ride. (I have to admit I initially fought this "push" to go give him the copy of the book I had) Anyway, I walked up to him and without saying anything I gave it to him. I will never know if he even looks at it, but I feel I did my part. This isn't meant as a "pat on the back" ...but to encourage you to look for opportunities. They are everywhere...and let's face it, with the way the world is right now (people out of jobs, going through tough times, feeling scared and in doubt, etc) people need encouragement and want to know that God is out there looking out for them. So let's allow God to use us...
My most recent, out of the ordinary opportunity, came on my trip this past weekend. I was sitting on a plane reading a book...the guy beside me realized I was reading about the book of James (from the Bible). To summarize the conversation...he was engaged, had just moved his fiance to a new city, was a Christian who actually served in the ministry at his church, and happen to know more about the book of James. He had a book in his hand that was required for his premarrital counseling...therefore, I told him of another book that was good for marriage (The 6 mosquitoes-actually more of a study and self reflection). What I didn't tell him was that I just happen to bring an extra copy of that study with me. So, as I was waiting to be picked up at the airport...I realized that he was on the phone and was also waiting on his ride. (I have to admit I initially fought this "push" to go give him the copy of the book I had) Anyway, I walked up to him and without saying anything I gave it to him. I will never know if he even looks at it, but I feel I did my part. This isn't meant as a "pat on the back" ...but to encourage you to look for opportunities. They are everywhere...and let's face it, with the way the world is right now (people out of jobs, going through tough times, feeling scared and in doubt, etc) people need encouragement and want to know that God is out there looking out for them. So let's allow God to use us...
Friday, August 14, 2009
Quality Friends
So I am heading out of town this weekend to see a great friend...so that has inspired my thinking on friends and friendship. What make a good friendship? The following are some of my thoughts:
-both being able to listen
-both being able to speak honestly with each other
-support through tough times
-support through happy times and big events
-prayer for one another
-quality time, whether by phone or face to face
I have been very fortunate in my life to make some amazing friends, some of which have played different roles. There are those who have truly challenged my in my Christianity, those who have been brutally honest, those who have been there in various ways during difficult times (when my father passed away recently), etc...let's put it this way, friends help you through life! So here's my challenge, are you a true friend? Are you someone that people can confide in...do they come to you when they need something...are you dependable? Just something to think about...I truly believe God intended for us (humans) to do life together...therefore, we need people. Not just people who are fun to be around, but people who challenge us to be better (as humans and Christians).
-both being able to listen
-both being able to speak honestly with each other
-support through tough times
-support through happy times and big events
-prayer for one another
-quality time, whether by phone or face to face
I have been very fortunate in my life to make some amazing friends, some of which have played different roles. There are those who have truly challenged my in my Christianity, those who have been brutally honest, those who have been there in various ways during difficult times (when my father passed away recently), etc...let's put it this way, friends help you through life! So here's my challenge, are you a true friend? Are you someone that people can confide in...do they come to you when they need something...are you dependable? Just something to think about...I truly believe God intended for us (humans) to do life together...therefore, we need people. Not just people who are fun to be around, but people who challenge us to be better (as humans and Christians).
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Politics & Race
There probably isn't a good way to get into this blog, but I am going to try my best. I don't believe it is a stretch to say that most African Americans vote for the democratic party (keep in mind I said most). I live in an area with an extremely large African American community & the only leaders that seem to be elected here are democrats (at least in the city of Memphis). I am not saying all democrats are bad by any means, but the ones that seem to be elected around here are ridiculous. We have a woman who continues to be arrested (for alcohol, for narcotics while driving, for fraud-after her license was taken she went and got a new one made, etc). Anywhere in America this lady wouldn't have a chance to represent people...she is a city council leader. Another example, we have had a mayor who has lasted 20+ years around here. Since I have lived here, he has done nothing but kept racism alive and flourishing. (an example, while elected this last time he made the following statement "I wanna shake the haters off out there"...referring to people that doesn't look like him, but like me) Needless to say, he is a joke...but the people have kept electing him.
So now what inspired this post...while listening to my new favorite Christian Talk Radio station (AFR) I heard an interview of Angela Mcglowen (I believe that is how you spell her name). She is an African American woman, political analyst, author, and on tv...while listening she professed her faith in Jesus Christ, which was great so I know where her mind set stems from. Then she went on to talk about voting Republican, being on Fox News, and how BET has allowed her to be a coorespondent for them so she can bring a different view point to the people. (another station, TV One, would not allow her to do the same...they wanted to keep one mind set for their viewing audience). I was sooo impressed by her in many ways, but especially for being an easy bullseye in the African American community. She wrote a book a few years back called, "Bamboozled" and the following is the summary from her website:
I hope this message came out the way it was intended...it definitely was not meant in a negative or mean racial context.
So now what inspired this post...while listening to my new favorite Christian Talk Radio station (AFR) I heard an interview of Angela Mcglowen (I believe that is how you spell her name). She is an African American woman, political analyst, author, and on tv...while listening she professed her faith in Jesus Christ, which was great so I know where her mind set stems from. Then she went on to talk about voting Republican, being on Fox News, and how BET has allowed her to be a coorespondent for them so she can bring a different view point to the people. (another station, TV One, would not allow her to do the same...they wanted to keep one mind set for their viewing audience). I was sooo impressed by her in many ways, but especially for being an easy bullseye in the African American community. She wrote a book a few years back called, "Bamboozled" and the following is the summary from her website:
BAMBOOZLED, her new book, demolishes once and for all the lies Liberals use to manipulate and exploit women, blacks and Latinos. Based on numerous interviews with some of America’s top leaders and political insiders, political strategist and Fox News analyst Angela McGlowan offers a rare behind-the-scenes look at how minorities are politically exploited.
I just find her viewpoint rare considering the community in which I live...the things she said reminded me of Bill Crosby and some of the stances he has taken over the years (speaking to black men, letting them know the importance of fatherhood, etc) Both Crosby and Mcglowen have taken a lot of criticism and heat for their stances on these issues, but both seem to stand their ground well. It's hard to believe they would be so criticized when they are trying to better a community.I hope this message came out the way it was intended...it definitely was not meant in a negative or mean racial context.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
TOWN HALL MEETING...
Where do I begin-my family and I attended a town hall meeting earlier today. The event started at 10:00, so we arrived about 9:40. The line was wrapped around the building with people of all variations (black, white, young, old, etc) We got in line, but finally made it in the location for the meeting. There were a lot of people behind us that still had to make it inside too. There were people with signs, video cameras, papers, and t-shirts. It truly seemed to be a good turn out.
Let's start with the positive...it is awesome to live in a country where we are able to somewhat voice our opinions, be able to gather in once place, etc. I am also grateful that the Congressman in our area had a "town hall" meeting, not all have done this. Another good thing, several doctors spoke at the event (both for and against the Healthcare Reform bill-mainly for some sort of reform, but not for this bill).
Now for my experience...one thing I have realized is that these people are smart at getting what they want. While standing in line, we were offered cards to write questions down on...which meant it wouldn't be an open mic event. You could tell alot of citizens were frustrated with this (including myself)...by taking questions via cards, the people in charge can filter through the cards and select what they want to talk about. Another result of this method, people don't feel they have a voice or are able to be heard, therefore you have grown adults just shouting!
Another frustrating thing was the lack of honesty...no I have not personally read the bill that has been presented before Congress...but, I have heard a lot about it...things I don't think he was honest about: abortion being funded by taxpayers, that people with insurance will be forced into government run healthcare at somepoint, that the poor aren't helped medically.
Ultimately, I honestly felt like nothing was accomplished...you have a Congressman that represents the people, but yet will still vote the way He wants, not how the majority of the people want. It felt like a waste of time...you show up, don't feel like your voice was heard, and have grown adults acting like immature children.
In closing...as voters we have to be realistic. The facts are that politics includes everything, including religion. Although there will probably not be a candidate or party that we completely agree with, they are still the ones that make decisions. So next time you go to vote, although you may not agree with everything...vote responsibly! Not only is the economy in shambles, quality healthcare is at stake, and those in power are going against what the majority of Americans are asking for. (which is not for a bill, that will affect all of Americans, be passed through and made into law before those who represent the people even read all of it.)
Let's start with the positive...it is awesome to live in a country where we are able to somewhat voice our opinions, be able to gather in once place, etc. I am also grateful that the Congressman in our area had a "town hall" meeting, not all have done this. Another good thing, several doctors spoke at the event (both for and against the Healthcare Reform bill-mainly for some sort of reform, but not for this bill).
Now for my experience...one thing I have realized is that these people are smart at getting what they want. While standing in line, we were offered cards to write questions down on...which meant it wouldn't be an open mic event. You could tell alot of citizens were frustrated with this (including myself)...by taking questions via cards, the people in charge can filter through the cards and select what they want to talk about. Another result of this method, people don't feel they have a voice or are able to be heard, therefore you have grown adults just shouting!
Another frustrating thing was the lack of honesty...no I have not personally read the bill that has been presented before Congress...but, I have heard a lot about it...things I don't think he was honest about: abortion being funded by taxpayers, that people with insurance will be forced into government run healthcare at somepoint, that the poor aren't helped medically.
Ultimately, I honestly felt like nothing was accomplished...you have a Congressman that represents the people, but yet will still vote the way He wants, not how the majority of the people want. It felt like a waste of time...you show up, don't feel like your voice was heard, and have grown adults acting like immature children.
In closing...as voters we have to be realistic. The facts are that politics includes everything, including religion. Although there will probably not be a candidate or party that we completely agree with, they are still the ones that make decisions. So next time you go to vote, although you may not agree with everything...vote responsibly! Not only is the economy in shambles, quality healthcare is at stake, and those in power are going against what the majority of Americans are asking for. (which is not for a bill, that will affect all of Americans, be passed through and made into law before those who represent the people even read all of it.)
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Terrible Comments...
I heard about the following comments on the radio today...I have not heard anything so harsh in all of my life, honestly. To say you hope someone commits suicide is a HORRIBLE thing...
now I realize that everyone on the "liberal" side would not condone this type of behavior, but something needs to be done to this Mike Malloy guy. Remember when Don Imus made the stupid comments on his show (the "nappy headed hoes" comment)...he got ripped for that (and yes, he was dumb in his comments). But how much worse are the comments that Mr. Malloy made? They are terrible...and if Imus got punished, this guy definitely needs to be taken off of the air. The following is what was said...I am pretty sure you can hear it on youtube if you want to see it officially.
(For those of you who don't keep up...Glenn Beck is a conservative with a radio program + a show on FoxNews. He has admitted to his past problems, along with his family's past problems...which for anyone to do to a national audience is humbling. He is proof that people can overcome family pain and addiction)
Liberal talk radio host Mike Malloy lashed out at conservative commentator Glenn Beck, who has a program on the Fox News Channel, saying he hopes Beck commits suicide “on camera,” particularly given that suicide “is rampant in his family” and that Beck apparently is “self-destructive.”
“I have good news to report,” said Malloy on his Aug. 4 radio program. “Glenn Beck appears closer to suicide. I'm hoping that he does it on camera.”
“Suicide is rampant in his family, and given his alcoholism and his tendencies towards self-destruction,” said Malloy, “I am only hoping that when Glenn Beck does put a gun to his head and pulls the trigger, that it’s on television, because somebody will capture it on YouTube and it will be the most popular little piece of video for months.”
now I realize that everyone on the "liberal" side would not condone this type of behavior, but something needs to be done to this Mike Malloy guy. Remember when Don Imus made the stupid comments on his show (the "nappy headed hoes" comment)...he got ripped for that (and yes, he was dumb in his comments). But how much worse are the comments that Mr. Malloy made? They are terrible...and if Imus got punished, this guy definitely needs to be taken off of the air. The following is what was said...I am pretty sure you can hear it on youtube if you want to see it officially.
(For those of you who don't keep up...Glenn Beck is a conservative with a radio program + a show on FoxNews. He has admitted to his past problems, along with his family's past problems...which for anyone to do to a national audience is humbling. He is proof that people can overcome family pain and addiction)
Liberal talk radio host Mike Malloy lashed out at conservative commentator Glenn Beck, who has a program on the Fox News Channel, saying he hopes Beck commits suicide “on camera,” particularly given that suicide “is rampant in his family” and that Beck apparently is “self-destructive.”
“I have good news to report,” said Malloy on his Aug. 4 radio program. “Glenn Beck appears closer to suicide. I'm hoping that he does it on camera.”
“Suicide is rampant in his family, and given his alcoholism and his tendencies towards self-destruction,” said Malloy, “I am only hoping that when Glenn Beck does put a gun to his head and pulls the trigger, that it’s on television, because somebody will capture it on YouTube and it will be the most popular little piece of video for months.”
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Bad Parenting...
As parents, it is our job to make decisions that will keep our children out of harms way. Don't get me wrong, I realize that accidents happen. However, letting 5 young children ride in the back of a truck...in Memphis...on a busy road, while getting on a busy interstate...with terrible drivers...can't be smart. These children appeared to be all under the age of 5, with the youngest looking to be under 2 years old. Even if the man driving was an excellent driver, the majority of Memphians aren't.
On another note...why do children in inner city areas tend to get into so much trouble? (Even what appears to be good kids, with good grades, with good test scores, who have success in sports) My guess, and yes this is an opinion, is bad parenting once again. I'm not able to go into any details, but it is a shame at the kids in this area who have potential...yet their own parents could care less at seeing them succeed in life. Therefore, they do nothing to help their children. I know some reading this will feel sorry for the parents, will think they are doing everything they can...the reality, that simply isn't so.
The answer...love, support, and quality time. As humans, parents will never be perfect...but that doesnt' mean we can't spend time with our kids, do our best to keep them out of harms way, or tell them we love them. Atleast these are places to start!
On another note...why do children in inner city areas tend to get into so much trouble? (Even what appears to be good kids, with good grades, with good test scores, who have success in sports) My guess, and yes this is an opinion, is bad parenting once again. I'm not able to go into any details, but it is a shame at the kids in this area who have potential...yet their own parents could care less at seeing them succeed in life. Therefore, they do nothing to help their children. I know some reading this will feel sorry for the parents, will think they are doing everything they can...the reality, that simply isn't so.
The answer...love, support, and quality time. As humans, parents will never be perfect...but that doesnt' mean we can't spend time with our kids, do our best to keep them out of harms way, or tell them we love them. Atleast these are places to start!
Monday, August 3, 2009
Importance of Family...
I know this may sound silly, but family is VERY important. God didn't create us to be alone and do life by ourselves. Just check out Genesis from the Bible on that one...he created Adam & Eve once he realized it was not good for man to be alone. So why is it that we often times do not cherish what God has given us? Over the weekend I was speaking with a friend who is engaged...family issues have taken the fore front...and she is currently not speaking with her father. Stories like that make me sad...this is supposed to be one of the happiest times in her life, yet her immediate family is being selfish and prideful. I can't imagine treating my daughter like that one day.
Another issue is the lack of commitment in marriage...I can't tell you how many of my friends are having severe marriage problems. Don't get me wrong, marriage isn't always a "walk in the park"...
but it is definitely worth the fight! God intended marriage to be a celebration and a wonderful aspect of life. Often times people lose sight of what is important...SO, if you or someone you know is having difficulty in their marriage (or serious relationship for that matter)...here are a couple of tools that could help:
-the movie "Fireproof"...it shows a great depiction of a dysfunctional marriage & how God can change hearts.
-the study to go along with the movie...The Love Dare
-another Bible based study that is really good...The 6 Mosquitoes (it goes into detail the 6 things that can suck the life out of your marriage and relationship
-counseling...there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage!
There are tons of things out there to help people through tough times...family starts with a healthy relationship between husband and wife. Family unity should be top priority in our lives, next to God of course!
Another issue is the lack of commitment in marriage...I can't tell you how many of my friends are having severe marriage problems. Don't get me wrong, marriage isn't always a "walk in the park"...
but it is definitely worth the fight! God intended marriage to be a celebration and a wonderful aspect of life. Often times people lose sight of what is important...SO, if you or someone you know is having difficulty in their marriage (or serious relationship for that matter)...here are a couple of tools that could help:
-the movie "Fireproof"...it shows a great depiction of a dysfunctional marriage & how God can change hearts.
-the study to go along with the movie...The Love Dare
-another Bible based study that is really good...The 6 Mosquitoes (it goes into detail the 6 things that can suck the life out of your marriage and relationship
-counseling...there is nothing wrong with working on your marriage!
There are tons of things out there to help people through tough times...family starts with a healthy relationship between husband and wife. Family unity should be top priority in our lives, next to God of course!
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